Paying attention to what’s working

Paying attention to what’s working

Paying attention to what’s working

Itā€™s often much easier to notice what weā€™re doing wrong, rather than what weā€™re doing right. Military and first responder roles rely on critical analysis of potential shortfalls in order to maximize safety.Ā 

Even when our actions are not motivated by the desire for recognition, itā€™s always satisfying to know when we got it right or that our efforts are making a difference.Ā 

The problem of focusing on our missteps and passing over successes, however small they might be, is that is fosters a bias to overlook the good when we are confronted with challenges.

I like to think of the person who came up with the idea of building the first boat.Ā  They may have thrown many items in the water and examined what made them sink, but chances are they spent more time examining what made things float in order to come up with the winning formula. It can often be easier to focus on our weaknesses rather than our strengths. But how much healthier would we be if we mastered the habit of noticing what we do well?

How might your day be different if the focus was on all the little things you are doing that are having a positive impact?Ā  Can you identify three in this moment?Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

The relationship we have with ourselves

The relationship we have with ourselves

The relationship we have with ourselves is often the most difficult

 

We often have automatic self beliefs that stop us from seeing ourselves accurately.Ā  If I believe that Iā€™m not enough in some way, my brain will selectively seek out examples that support this belief. I might ignore the many signs that contradict it.

Group involvement offers a chance to get to know ourselves better. Itā€™s an opportunity for growth. By seeing ourselves through the compassionate lens of others, we alter the way in which we view ourselves.

The stories we make up about ourselves may not always be true. They might just be habits. When we can name these things, we take away some of their power. We have a chance to tell the story differently.

Are you carrying any stories that you might like to re-write?

Weā€™d love to hear from you.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Being intentional about our space

Being intentional about our space

Being intentional about our space

Busy lives can often translate into cluttered homes. In many ways, our environments really do reflect our internal states.

My husband Joe is going away for work for an extended period of time this fall. He doesnā€™t yet know it, but amazing things are going to happen to our home in his absence. Inspired by the Home Edit, Iā€™m committed to intentionally organizing our house so that it is calming and joyful. I actually want to have fun with this. Itā€™ll be important for me to place items that spark happiness in plain sight.

Deb Dana, Social Worker and Polyvagal Theory expert speaks of the importance of objects and surroundings as tools for self-regulation. She suggests that we take a moment to find something that reminds us of the feeling of being anchored and calm (regulated), then placing it somewhere weā€™ll see it as we move through our day.

Simple suggestions for positive internal shifts.

In our next Maintaining Health Program weā€™re going to explore more of Deb Danaā€™s work. Weā€™re calling the day ā€œGet Your Glimmer On.ā€ Itā€™s in person, with a trip toĀ Makerā€™sĀ in the afternoon. Please let us know if you are planning on coming so that we might order lunch and reserve a spot for you

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

No risk no reward

No risk no reward

No risk no reward

Often the things that are the most rewarding involve challenging ourselves. Itā€™s through pushing the limits of whatā€™s comfortable that we discover our strengths: whether itā€™s through signing up to race in the Valley Harvest Run or allowing ourselves to be seen and heard within group. Taking small risks, while scary at first, ultimately allows us to become more confident healthy versions of ourselves.

What challenges might you look forward to this fall?

Are you willing to lean out of your comfort into an area of new growth

What could you tell yourself when that little voice in your head threatens to get in your way?

We still have spots in the on-lineĀ Identity and Transition programĀ if this speaks to you. Weā€™re a community that supports each other as we take small risks aimed to improve the quality of our lives.

Anything worth doing likely has something in it thatā€™s hard.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

The courage to show our true selves

The courage to show our true selves

The courage to show our true selves

Recently I watched two really well-done documentaries on Netflix about Olympic Athletes who underwent gender transitions: Olympic Decathlon gold Medalist Caitlyn (formerly Bruce) Jenner, and professional Skateboarder Leo Baker (documentaries titled Untold Caitlyn Jenner; and Stay on Board the Leo Baker Story respectively). Both stories describe the inner struggle faced by people who are very much public figures who feel unable to reveal their true selves without facing devastating consequences. Both Caitlyn and Leo are exceptional people who desperately want to live their true lives, no longer feeling able to keep up the image of what others expect of them. The whole world watches, and many criticize as they speak their respective truths.

Although these are stories about gender transition, they are ultimately tales of struggle, courage, conviction, and staying true to oneself. It is a theme of having to give up a former identity and learning to embrace something new. These themes are universal. What interested me most was the notion that inner struggle was possibly an important part of what motivated these athletes to become world class. Our struggles also become character defining strengths.

I wanted to take a moment to salute all individuals who possess the courage to walk a new path: be it gender transition, or rediscovering or redefining oneself following injury.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Training and expertise canā€™t help but shine through

Training and expertise canā€™t help but shine through

Training and expertise canā€™t help but shine through

Weā€™ve just started a new Healthy Living program that involves participation in the community. Once a week, after our morning programming, a group of Landing Strong members attendĀ the Windsor Makerā€™s studio to work with artists in specialized areas such as ceramics, glass fusion, painting and woodworking.

Itā€™s been a blast, but there have been a few surprisesĀ along the way.

The first day, our group members blew through the glass fusion workshop. What normally is completed in 2 hours took our highly specialized team of veterans and first responders 40 minutes to complete. Not to be undone, the instructor Cheryl good-naturedly upped the ante, inviting participants to make their own designs, cutting and buffing the glass in order to create beautiful large sized fusion glass art.

Weā€™re talking highly technical, precision work.

Instead of shrinking back, the team rose to the challenge. They quickly formed an efficient team with members working collaboratively to draw, cut and buff the 15 houses needed for their projects.

Adapt, Improvise and Overcome.

In the ceramics corner, participants applied unbelievable focus and skill in the creation and glazing of fantastic over-sized mugs.

In the painting section, our veteran artists whipped off dot mandalas with hand control precision, speed and accuracy that was humbling.

Even when relaxing, the training, skill, focus, teamwork and adaptability of our community members shone through. Most importantly, there was a lot of laughter and cheerful banter.

I am reminded of how highly skilled our population is, even following injury. I look forward to next week, and only hope I can keep up.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong