It’s often much easier to notice what we’re doing wrong, rather than what we’re doing right. Military and first responder roles rely on critical analysis of potential shortfalls in order to maximize safety.
Even when our actions are not motivated by the desire for recognition, it’s always satisfying to know when we got it right or that our efforts are making a difference.
The problem of focusing on our missteps and passing over successes, however small they might be, is that is fosters a bias to overlook the good when we are confronted with challenges.
I like to think of the person who came up with the idea of building the first boat. They may have thrown many items in the water and examined what made them sink, but chances are they spent more time examining what made things float in order to come up with the winning formula. It can often be easier to focus on our weaknesses rather than our strengths. But how much healthier would we be if we mastered the habit of noticing what we do well?
How might your day be different if the focus was on all the little things you are doing that are having a positive impact? Can you identify three in this moment?
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Triggers or glimmers? It’s all a matter of attention
PTSD is a condition where our central nervous systems are constantly scanning for potential threats. It’s our brains’ way of keeping us safe. The problem is, it’s easy to miss the good stuff. By hyper-focusing on danger, we overlook signs of safety.
We may have a good sense of triggers, those are the people, places or things that create a sense of danger or unease. In contrast, Trauma Specialist Deb Dana introduced the term glimmer to describe experiences that foster a sense of safety. Glimmers are small moments that help shift our system towards calm.
This month in our Maintaining Health group, we worked on recognizing Glimmers. It’s really about intention. Noticing both sides of the equation.
Hurricane Fiona created challenges for many. It also brought out the best as communities bonded together to help one another. A tree may have fallen on my veranda, but the plentiful rain produced the best crop of carrots I have ever had. I’ve never seen such abundance. That’s my glimmer.
If you catch yourself focusing on the threat or problem, take a mindful moment to balance the equation. Notice the simple things that bring you peace: the crisp fall air, colourful leaves, or pumpkin people dancing on the lawns of Kentville.
Don’t forget to enjoy the glimmers.
Warm Regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Last night marked the launch of our first Date Night series. Can I take a moment to tell you how wonderful it was sharing the evening with twelve wonderful people who jumped in to be led by Kara Lister Wade as we created shadow boxes of favorite memories. What a treat to meet the significant others of our Landing Strong community. We were offered glimpses into people’s favorite moments, sharing details of positive experiences. Twinkle lights, delectable treats and candlelight transformed the space, rounded out by laughter, creativity and good company. Special thanks to Mackenzie for her beautiful charcuterie boxes and assorted sweets. Most remarkable to me was the distance people travelled in order to attend. Two couples drove from three hours away, one couple drove 90 minutes to be there, a few were an hour drive away and one lived locally: such was their commitment to attend. I can’t help but reflect on the specialness of the evening, and the residual warmth I am experiencing as a result of it.
Next month we’ll be having Chinese food. Please let us know your favorite dish if you are planning on coming. Kara will lead us through a new journey of creativity. These events are for couples, partners or close friends.
Wishing you all a restful and rejuvenating weekend.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Often the things that are the most rewarding involve challenging ourselves. It’s through pushing the limits of what’s comfortable that we discover our strengths: whether it’s through signing up to race in the Valley Harvest Run or allowing ourselves to be seen and heard within group. Taking small risks, while scary at first, ultimately allows us to become more confident healthy versions of ourselves.
What challenges might you look forward to this fall?
Are you willing to lean out of your comfort into an area of new growth
What could you tell yourself when that little voice in your head threatens to get in your way?
We still have spots in the on-lineIdentity and Transition programif this speaks to you. We’re a community that supports each other as we take small risks aimed to improve the quality of our lives.
Anything worth doing likely has something in it that’s hard.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Recently I watched two really well-done documentaries on Netflix about Olympic Athletes who underwent gender transitions: Olympic Decathlon gold Medalist Caitlyn (formerly Bruce) Jenner, and professional Skateboarder Leo Baker (documentaries titled Untold Caitlyn Jenner; and Stay on Board the Leo Baker Story respectively). Both stories describe the inner struggle faced by people who are very much public figures who feel unable to reveal their true selves without facing devastating consequences. Both Caitlyn and Leo are exceptional people who desperately want to live their true lives, no longer feeling able to keep up the image of what others expect of them. The whole world watches, and many criticize as they speak their respective truths.
Although these are stories about gender transition, they are ultimately tales of struggle, courage, conviction, and staying true to oneself. It is a theme of having to give up a former identity and learning to embrace something new. These themes are universal. What interested me most was the notion that inner struggle was possibly an important part of what motivated these athletes to become world class. Our struggles also become character defining strengths.
I wanted to take a moment to salute all individuals who possess the courage to walk a new path: be it gender transition, or rediscovering or redefining oneself following injury.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Last week we held a celebration for veteran and first responders who have completed The Landing Strong Foundation and Work Force Reintegration Programs. We worked hard to make the event special, but I must confess I was holding my breath, not knowing how many people would come. Turns out, the day was a resounding success, with more than 40 veterans and first responders attending, many of whom brought family members.
A few highlights of the day included guests being greeted by grade six members of the 254 King’s-Edgehill School Highland Cadet Corps under the direction of Major Keith Hynes; being treated to heartfelt renditions of “You are not alone” and “This is me” by the King’s-Edgehill School choir, led by Stephanie Fillman; and most importantly, the presentation of our graduates, thanked by Board Chair Chrystal Fuller and MP Kody Blois.
Before coming, many of our graduates voiced a concern that they did not feel like heroes, they were simply people who did their jobs. I pointed out that we were not celebrating the work they did in the past in their official roles (although that certainly contained many heroic moments), but rather, the ongoing heroic work they are doing now in recovery. As our celebrated guests listened to the contribution of other members of their community, it was impossible for them not to realize that they were part of a very special and unique group of highly skilled professionals who had dedicated their entire lives to the safety, health and protection of country and community. All are continuing to give, continually asking themselves the question “How can I help?” It felt a bit like a superhero convention that we had the privilege of attending.
Veteran’s Affairs Minister Lawrence MacAulay, PC, MP has been a firm supporter of Landing Strong. Although he was unable to attend in person, he sent his best wishes to “our country’s brave women and men in uniform, who have sacrificed so much so that we can live in a more peaceful world.
Regarding his recent visit to Landing Strong he added:
“I would also like to thank the group of Veterans who attended that evening for sharing their stories and experiences. All Canadians owe them a debt of gratitude for their dedicated service to our nation, and my department is committed to supporting their mental well-being.”
We are happy to celebrate our Spring Program Graduates, whether they were able to come that day or not and look forward to future community events and celebrations.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
