Recovery isn’t linear

Recovery isn’t linear

High performance athletes can’t always do what’s expected.  Occasionally, they might have a minor sprain or injury that needs nurturing.  In the case of a major setback, they might be on the sidelines for a longer period of time.  This doesn’t mean they aren’t a top performer.  It simply means that no matter what we’re good at, or what we’re trying to work on, none of us can be good at it all of the time.  
 
Sometimes when we have a setback, it might be easy to doubt whether we’ve made any progress at all.  
 
Maybe the good mood I had last month wasn’t real…”
 
I feel like I’m back at square one”
 
I thought I was doing so much better, what does it mean now that I’m really struggling?”
 
As in any journey, the path has peaks and valleys.  The emotions you feel at any one point in time will never be a constant.  True, the good times will pass… but so will the bad. 
 
The most important thing to remember in those moments of self-doubt is that’s the time to reach out.  It’s totally counter-intuitive, but a certain way to turn things around quickly.  When we most want to retreat, that’s actually when we need to advance.  
 
Don’t wait until you’re feeling good to join one of our groups… it would be a very empty room if we all took that approach.  Take a look at the programs we’re offering in the new year and see if there’s one that seems right for you.  There’s a seat waiting for you. 

Warm regards, 

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Keeping ourselves hidden

Keeping ourselves hidden

During a recent training trip in Quebec, I took advantage of a warm afternoon by taking a stroll down a remote country road.  At the end of the road, the sound of a trickling waterfall caught my attention. Drawn towards it, I spied a small blue door supported by weathered stone pillars.  On the door was a sign declaring “Propriete Privee,” or private property.  Surrounding the small waterfall were five lines of barbed wire, ensuring that no one enter the property.  
 
What a shame, I thought to myself, that such a special spot be barred from view by others.  The owners may have had good reason to guard their property – perhaps trespassers had abused the privilege of visiting.  I realized though, that those past incidents served to form the rationale for a permanent barrier.  The gate served not only to keep people out, it also prevented people from coming in.
 
It isn’t uncommon that we build barriers to keep ourselves safe following trauma.  Whether it’s imaginary walls or barbed wire, the thought of letting others in can be threatening.  I have no doubt that when we build the walls we do so because they are needed.  How do we know, though, when it’s safe to take them down?
 
Joining a treatment group offers a safe way to connect with others.  You’ll never be asked to share anything you aren’t ready to share, and we offer a structured and supportive way of exploring topics that we hope you’ll find useful on your journey to health. We still have a few seats left in the “Stop Faking Good & Start Feeling Good” group, please call to sign up soon to avoid disappointment.  Our upcoming Community Connection days allow a more informal way of connecting and having fun.  Running over three Fridays in October, the first one on October 4th is for Veterans and First Responders who have taken programs at Landing Strong.  The second (being held on October 11th) is opened to those who have taken group programs with us and to their partners, spouses and others who have been important supports.  On October 18th, we welcome anyone who has taken a Landing Strong Program as well as any Veteran, Military Member or First Responder who might be thinking of taking a program, but aren’t sure and want a chance to test the waters.  We are offering these Community Connection Days free of charge, just give us a phone call to let us know you’re coming.
 
Warm regards, 

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

The business of getting better: part 2

The business of getting better: part 2

Lesson 2: Developing your own personal brand

Welcome to our second week of applying business principles to health and recovery.  This week, I’d like to talk to you about the power of belief.

Branding is a term in marketing that helps us understand the intended customer experience.  Donald Miller, in his book Building a Story Brand, describes branding as a transformational process: it’s a journey that offers promise of a desired final destination.  Our “brand” is our aspirational identity.  It’s how we want to feel.  Branding is about helping to guide people toward a stronger belief in themselves.  

Miller provides the example of Starbucks.  When you purchase a Starbuck’s coffee, you’re buying much more than coffee.  You’re buying an experience – a way of seeing yourself – sophisticated, chic, someone worthy of being treated to something special.  The simple act of drinking coffee is transformed into an experience of savouring, and the price becomes secondary to the experience.  Marketing genius.  

I think about how we describe ourselves to others, and wonder how our personal branding affects how we are perceived, and treated.

Do you view (and describe) yourself as an injured veteran or first responder?  Or are you someone who is embarking on a journey of personal growth following traumatic exposure?  

Are you unemployed, or taking time to learn more about yourself?

Are you exhausted, or rather, in need of a well-earned break?

Are you trying to recover what was lost, or looking to broaden who you can be?

Are you overwhelmed by emotions, or enriching your ability to feel and connect with others?

It’s worth considering how you want to feel, and being mindful to integrate these words into your internal vocabulary.  Words are powerful, for they are the utterance of our internal brand. 

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Founder, Landing Strong

The business of getting better: part 1

The business of getting better: part 1

Lately I’ve been doing a lot of reading about business.  At Landing Strong, we’re committed to providing top-tier services on a non-profit budget.  Hence the need for great business strategizing. 

As I read, I’m struck by how many business principles are equally relevant to health and recovery. Over the next four weeks, I’d like to share with you things I’m learning with the hopes that you too will find them helpful.  Please join me on my voyage of inspiration.

Lesson 1: Success is the bi-product of a series of small experiments

It’s an unfortunate reality that most new businesses fail. In the Lean Start Up, Eric Ries claims this is because new business owners tend to make a common error: they put a large investment into a single idea and hope like heck that that they got it right.  The author suggests a more innovative approach to entrepreneurship is to run start-ups like a series of small experiments that inform and guide business development.  No single stage is too big an investment, and it is always possible to pivot and change tactics if it looks like an idea isn’t working out as expected.  

I love this notion, because there’s no pressure to get it right the first time.  In fact, the assumption is that you likely won’t get it right immediately, and you’ll probably have to continuously gather feedback to inform product refinement.

What if we applied this principle to healing and recovery?  One of the most common errors I witness in terms of people who are trying to make changes in their lives is the pressure they put on themselves to get it right the first time they try something new.  If it doesn’t work, they assume it was a bad idea.  Maybe, in fact, it was a great idea, it just needed a bit of feedback and fine tuning. 

When we design new Landing Strong programs, we work hard to get client feedback at the end of each session. Why?  Because our assumption is there are parts that were likely great, and other parts will probably need to be tweaked in order to improve.  The program becomes the product of an organic interaction between facilitator and participants.

Recovering from trauma exposure involves reinventing the self.  It is, in a way, a new business start-up.  Instead of waiting to have it all figured out and hoping we get it “right” let’s consider recovery as a series of small experiments in which you will be trying on new ideas or behaviours, seeing which are helpful and which need tweaking.  We should expect the first version of anything won’t likely be right.  Rather, it’s a first step in the gradual shaping of something new and wonderful. 
 

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Founder, Landing Strong

Safe and stuck vs uncertain and growing

Safe and stuck vs uncertain and growing

Have I ever mentioned how much I love homemade chocolate chip cookies?  Something deep within me settles as the familiar aroma of fresh baked goodness wafts through my kitchen. The simple routine of baking offers me reassurance that all will be okay. 

Although routines can be comforting, never straying from them has consequences.  Just because old habits make me feel good doesn’t mean they’re always good for me.  I love that there are things in life that are a sure bet, but at the same time, realize that taking risks is part of moving forward.  

I’ve taken a lot of risks lately.  I’ll admit it, it has not been easy.  It would definitely have been simpler and easier to stay in a place that’s old and familiar. 

So why do it you might ask?  Why challenge myself when I could simply sit at home baking cookies and watching Netflix?

Truth is, I believe there’s something big around the corner.  Something wonderful that’s worth the journey.  We’re not quite there yet, but we’re getting there.  You and me and the Landing Strong Team.   

How incredible that we allow ourselves to venture into that new place together.
 

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Founder, Landing Strong

Small steps in the right direction

Small steps in the right direction

It’s supposed to be spring, but it’s still cold outside.  We’ve had a couple glimpses of sun and warmth, only to be quickly reminded that winter isn’t too far in our rear view mirror.  Remember, objects in mirror are closer than they appear.  This year, more so than many I remember, the wait for spring feels long.  Winter brought with it a lot of ice, restricting movement and keeping us confined to our homes perhaps more than usual.  With the promise of warmer days just around the corner, many of us are likely seeding our lawns, tilling soil, and preparing for growth in the new season.  

This growth can take a lot of forms.  It may be literally working in your yard, or might look a little different: inviting someone new out to coffee; speaking to a friend or family member from your heart; trying something new; making the decision to get help; or continuing your growth through participating in a workshop.  

What kind of growth are you looking for this season?  What specific steps can you take towards reaching that goal?  

Remember, small steps in the right direction eventually get us somewhere big.

Warm regards,

Belinda