Do you read the obituaries? I do. I didn’t use to, but since I have moved to our small community, I have a deeper sense of connection to those around me. I’m surprised by how often I recognize the names or families listed. Living in a small town, I’m more aware of the trials and tribulations of others in my community. When I pass the fruit and vegetable section at Sobey’s, I expect to run into an old friend who I would often see there, only to be reminded he is no longer with us. When I see fundraising notes and coin jars on the counters of local stores, I’m more inclined to donate knowing that I likely have an indirect connection to the face I see on the bottle. When our first responders pass by areas on the highways that mark the sites of accidents, they too are reminded of losses. Having grown up in downtown Toronto, I wasn’t used to that degree of connection.
I received a letter from my father last week, and for the first time noted a shakiness in his writing that reminds me of his passing years. I pray that those who reside on his busy Toronto street will keep an eye out for him, as I know we look out for each. Together we celebrate, grieve, struggle and grow. Growth, recovery and healing lies in the heart beat of our communities. Strength lies in connection.
In appreciation of each and every one of you who helps to make us strong,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself.
On this Remembrance Day, I give special thanks to those who have made sacrifices in the name of our country and our freedom. Whether they went to war or were impacted here at home, it’s a time for acknowledging that there are many who suffered injuries on our behalf. Even after wounds have healed, invisible injuries continue to affect many military members, veterans, first responders and the families who support them. For many of us, Remembrance Day is a daily occurrence.
For each of you, we give thanks for your work and the sacrifices you have made in the line of duty.
Recovery isn’t about forgetting our experiences, forgiving ourselves for past actions, or leaving an old identity behind. Overcoming trauma is finding a way to live a meaningful life within a supportive community, despite the things that may have happened. It’s a way of living comfortably, despite discomfort.
Anything that evokes intense emotion can be scary because it makes us feel vulnerable. Love can be like that, but so can the harder feelings. Remembrance Day brings up a lot of emotion for many people. You may want to go to a ceremony because a part of you feels that you should. You may worry about who you might run into, about losing composure in public, or not knowing how you fit in. You may prefer to spend the day at home with loved ones. This is a highly personal decision, and there are no right or wrong answers. Whatever you choose to do, we hope that you do not do it alone. Know that we are there with you.
*The painting pictured above, titled Winter Poppies, was created by an incredibly talented veteran and artist Kelly Mitchelmore. She also painted the striking forest scene that hangs in our waiting room. (Please note, this image is subject to copyright)
Connecting with Belinda
Founder Belinda Seagram, Ph.D. shares regular blog posts to inspire you during your journey.