Live long, Laugh, and Prosper

Live long, Laugh, and Prosper

by | Nov 4, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Courage, Love, Resilience

Live long, Laugh, and Prosper

This Halloween, I was scheduled to attend a lunch time meeting at King’s-Edgehill School. Traditionally, the school makes a very big deal of Halloween…EVERYONE dresses up. Wanting to be part of the fun, I decided to wear a costume. Unfortunately, what I didn’t know was that the school had their dress up day the previous week.

Imagine my dismay when I found myself in full Star Trek costume surrounded by a sea of students in uniforms.

I too was in uniform, only it was from wrong planet.

Somehow, this wasn’t the way I imagined this would play out.

The incidental bonus to the day is that I realized everyone I encountered was eager to join the fun. On seeing my costume, Lezlee and Jen, our Office Admin staff, ran out to Dollarama to get fun costumes and a treat bowl. Everyone smiled when greeted by a witch and a cat in the reception. Clients greeted me in the lobby with the traditional Klingon hand signals and greetings.

As the day progressed, I forgot that I was in costume, but the smiles and jokes from others reminded me that we all enjoy an excuse to laugh together.

When people feel joyful, they break into spontaneous play.

Small acts of fun truly do spark joy.

Maybe that’s the take-away from my day. Live long, laugh and prosperWarm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Paying attention to what’s working

Paying attention to what’s working

by | Oct 28, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Recovery, Resilience

Paying attention to what’s working

It’s often much easier to notice what we’re doing wrong, rather than what we’re doing right. Military and first responder roles rely on critical analysis of potential shortfalls in order to maximize safety. 

Even when our actions are not motivated by the desire for recognition, it’s always satisfying to know when we got it right or that our efforts are making a difference. 

The problem of focusing on our missteps and passing over successes, however small they might be, is that is fosters a bias to overlook the good when we are confronted with challenges.

I like to think of the person who came up with the idea of building the first boat.  They may have thrown many items in the water and examined what made them sink, but chances are they spent more time examining what made things float in order to come up with the winning formula. It can often be easier to focus on our weaknesses rather than our strengths. But how much healthier would we be if we mastered the habit of noticing what we do well?

How might your day be different if the focus was on all the little things you are doing that are having a positive impact?  Can you identify three in this moment?Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Triggers or glimmers? It’s all a matter of attention

Triggers or glimmers? It’s all a matter of attention

by | Oct 21, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Gratitude, Growth, Resilience

Triggers or glimmers? It’s all a matter of attention

PTSD is a condition where our central nervous systems are constantly scanning for potential threats. It’s our brains’ way of keeping us safe. The problem is, it’s easy to miss the good stuff. By hyper-focusing on danger, we overlook signs of safety.

We may have a good sense of triggers, those are the people, places or things that create a sense of danger or unease.  In contrast, Trauma Specialist Deb Dana introduced the term glimmer to describe experiences that foster a sense of safety.  Glimmers are small moments that help shift our system towards calm. 

This month in our Maintaining Health group, we worked on recognizing Glimmers. It’s really about intention. Noticing both sides of the equation.

Hurricane Fiona created challenges for many. It also brought out the best as communities bonded together to help one another. A tree may have fallen on my veranda, but the plentiful rain produced the best crop of carrots I have ever had. I’ve never seen such abundance. That’s my glimmer.

If you catch yourself focusing on the threat or problem, take a mindful moment to balance the equation. Notice the simple things that bring you peace: the crisp fall air, colourful leaves, or pumpkin people dancing on the lawns of Kentville.

Don’t forget to enjoy the glimmers.Warm Regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

An evening to remember

An evening to remember

by | Oct 14, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Communication, Community, Our Program

An evening to remember

Last night marked the launch of our first Date Night series. Can I take a moment to tell you how wonderful it was sharing the evening with twelve wonderful people who jumped in to be led by Kara Lister Wade as we created shadow boxes of favorite memories. What a treat to meet the significant others of our Landing Strong community. We were offered glimpses into people’s favorite moments, sharing details of positive experiences. Twinkle lights, delectable treats and candlelight transformed the space, rounded out by laughter, creativity and good company. Special thanks to Mackenzie for her beautiful charcuterie boxes and assorted sweets. Most remarkable to me was the distance people travelled in order to attend. Two couples drove from three hours away, one couple drove 90 minutes to be there, a few were an hour drive away and one lived locally: such was their commitment to attend. I can’t help but reflect on the specialness of the evening, and the residual warmth I am experiencing as a result of it.

Next month we’ll be having Chinese food. Please let us know your favorite dish if you are planning on coming. Kara will lead us through a new journey of creativity. These events are for couples, partners or close friends.

Wishing you all a restful and rejuvenating weekend.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Resiliency isn’t a bullet proof vest

Resiliency isn’t a bullet proof vest

by | Oct 7, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Courage, Resilience, Support

Resiliency isn’t a bullet proof vest

How do you define resilience? Many might think of a titanium vest that deflects bullets or adversity: a protective shell that protects from harm.

Recently, I have come to understand resiliency as something softer, sweeter.

It’s the ability to work through emotions rather than shutting them down.

To be able to slow down time when the world around us is speeding up.

It’s about making space to really talk and listen to the people who are important to us, asking for what we need and learning to be emotionally present without judgement.

The work of resiliency happens behind close doors, in sharing circles.

Injured Veterans and First Responders often complain that they are too quick to experience sadness. They view it as evidence of injury since they used to be able to “turn their emotions off.”  Me, I view it as a sign of recovery.  Emotional availability is resiliency starting to take shape.

A wise First Responder recently shared a Thomas Edison quote with me that captures the notion of resiliency quite succinctly: Most people miss opportunity and look over it because they don’t recognize it looks like overalls and hard work.

Together, we ‘ll strap on our coveralls and not be afraid to stir up some dust. Ultimately that’s what allows clarity.

But it’s not all about hard work. We also need to have fun. We’re excited to announce the launch of our new program Date Night. It’s a chance to reconnect with the fun, playful side of yourself and enjoy a stress-free evening with a close friend or partner. Join us for an evening of creativity, conversation and connection. The first Date Night starts on Thursday, October 13th from 6-9 pm. Thanks to the support of Employment and Social Development Canada, there is no fee for this program. Light refreshments are provided.

We are also registering participants for our second round of Creating Confidence Clarifying Strengths, scheduled to start November 1, 2022. This feel-good program is receiving rave reviews and has no fee thanks to the generous funding of ACOA.

Call (902) 472-2972 or email info@landingstrong.com to register.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Things I am grateful for

Things I am grateful for

by | Sep 30, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Resilience

Things I am grateful for

Today is National Day for Truth and Reconciliation: A day dedicated to honouring survivors of the residential schools as well as those children who never returned home. It’s a time to acknowledge the painful impact these dark periods of our history have had, and continue to have on individuals, families and communities. Public commemoration of the tragic history and ongoing impacts of residential schools has been identified as a vital component of the reconciliation process.

I am incredibly grateful that the words Truth and Reconciliation are given the weight they deserve and are becoming so deeply imbedded within our cultural understanding. We may be powerless to change the past, but as a society we are able to take the time to fully understand the historical impacts of our actions, take stock of where we stand today, and plan for an enlightened future.

On a side note, and in no way to detract from the importance of this day, I also wanted to express gratitude for all of the first responders, hydro and emergency workers who worked tirelessly over the past week to restore power, order and safety to our communities following Hurricane Fiona. My son Albert lives in the 40-unit Dartmouth apartment building that was emergency evacuated in the middle of the night during the hurricane. It was an unsettling time, but the impression that he is left with was the kindness, generosity and positive spirit of neighbours, first responders and volunteers alike. He spoke of the efficiency of an emergency response system that organized warm busses for evicted residents to stay in rather than standing in the raging storm; the kindness and compassion of the Red Cross Workers who handed him a blanket and showed him a cot in the Sportsplex at four in the morning; and the good humour of his neighbours who jokingly commented “they had always wanted a pool, too bad it was in the living room when they had hoped to have it in their bedroom”. In true Nova Scotia style, they meet adversity with good humour and a positive spirit.

I am happy to witness the kindness of strangers, generosity of spirit, and willingness of society to undergo a process of self reflection, ensuring all members of our community feel welcomed, respected and cared for.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Gather your storm chips close

Gather your storm chips close

by | Sep 23, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Plan, Virtual Community

Gather your storm chips close

Fall on the East Coast is a time of predictably volatile weather. As Mother Nature unleashes Hurricane Fiona upon us, we batten down the hatches, gather our Storm Chips, and hope the power isn’t off for too long. We lost part of our house to Dorian. Like a whale floundering in the surf, our roof was harpooned by falling tree limbs, and our side entrance completely flattened. I trust we’ll fare better this time around.

On Saturday I’m supposed to be presenting at a First Responders Conference in Bridgewater. Somehow I don’t think that’s going to happen…you’ll all be busy.

Our community is fantastic for emergency preparedness and lending a helping hand. I know many of our first responders will likely be out there battling the elements and its consequences over the next day or so. We send a mental note of thanks on behalf of us all. While we are staying warm and dry inside, we know that you are likely out there working hard to keep us safe.

Warm wishes on a wet cool day,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

The relationship we have with ourselves

The relationship we have with ourselves

by | Sep 16, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Friday Inspiration, Recovery

The relationship we have with ourselves is often the most difficult

 

We often have automatic self beliefs that stop us from seeing ourselves accurately.  If I believe that I’m not enough in some way, my brain will selectively seek out examples that support this belief. I might ignore the many signs that contradict it.

Group involvement offers a chance to get to know ourselves better. It’s an opportunity for growth. By seeing ourselves through the compassionate lens of others, we alter the way in which we view ourselves.

The stories we make up about ourselves may not always be true. They might just be habits. When we can name these things, we take away some of their power. We have a chance to tell the story differently.

Are you carrying any stories that you might like to re-write?

We’d love to hear from you.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Being intentional about our space

Being intentional about our space

by | Sep 9, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Friday Inspiration, Recovery

Being intentional about our space

Busy lives can often translate into cluttered homes. In many ways, our environments really do reflect our internal states.

My husband Joe is going away for work for an extended period of time this fall. He doesn’t yet know it, but amazing things are going to happen to our home in his absence. Inspired by the Home Edit, I’m committed to intentionally organizing our house so that it is calming and joyful. I actually want to have fun with this. It’ll be important for me to place items that spark happiness in plain sight.

Deb Dana, Social Worker and Polyvagal Theory expert speaks of the importance of objects and surroundings as tools for self-regulation. She suggests that we take a moment to find something that reminds us of the feeling of being anchored and calm (regulated), then placing it somewhere we’ll see it as we move through our day.

Simple suggestions for positive internal shifts.

In our next Maintaining Health Program we’re going to explore more of Deb Dana’s work. We’re calling the day “Get Your Glimmer On.” It’s in person, with a trip to Maker’s in the afternoon. Please let us know if you are planning on coming so that we might order lunch and reserve a spot for you

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

No risk no reward

No risk no reward

by | Sep 2, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Recovery, Resilience

No risk no reward

Often the things that are the most rewarding involve challenging ourselves. It’s through pushing the limits of what’s comfortable that we discover our strengths: whether it’s through signing up to race in the Valley Harvest Run or allowing ourselves to be seen and heard within group. Taking small risks, while scary at first, ultimately allows us to become more confident healthy versions of ourselves.

What challenges might you look forward to this fall?

Are you willing to lean out of your comfort into an area of new growth

What could you tell yourself when that little voice in your head threatens to get in your way?

We still have spots in the on-line Identity and Transition program if this speaks to you. We’re a community that supports each other as we take small risks aimed to improve the quality of our lives.

Anything worth doing likely has something in it that’s hard.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong