What do we regret?

What do we regret?

by | Jun 17, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Courage, Love, Resilience

What do we regret?

Looking back on my life, there are definitely things I wish I’d done differently.  Had I known up front the consequences of some decisions I made, I may have chosen another path.   

Hmmm…would I have chosen to work in the federal penitentiary?  That’s a big one. 

The thing is, I like who I am now.  I understand people’s struggles because I too have been there.   

I’m the bi-product of all decisions made to this point in time, good and bad. I’ve survived even my most human moments. 

Maya Angelou stated: 

      I can be changed by what happens to me.  But I refuse to be reduced by it. 

Instead of having regrets, let’s choose to celebrate the wisdom we gain from our experiences. Cherish our scars and the stories they tell.  

With forgiveness, and acceptance, we rise together.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

The courage to forgive

The courage to forgive

by | Jun 10, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Courage, Forgiveness, Mindfulness, Resilience

The courage to forgive

I’ve been working in the field of trauma for close to thirty years: in women’s shelters, the federal penitentiary system, hospitals, schools and community. In all the dark spaces and all of the dark places, one universal truth I’ve come to understand is that healing and compassion are closely intertwined. Anger and shame anchor us to the past, whereas forgiveness and self-compassion pave the way forward. When we live in anger, we allow others to control the narrative of our journey. There’s incredible freedom in letting go.


Martin Luther King Jr. understood this when he wrote:

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.


Desmond Tutu states:

Forgiveness is not weak. It takes incredible courage to face and overcome powerful emotions.


Next Thursday, our Maintaining Health Program is going to explore the freedom that accompanies compassion and forgiveness.

If you’ve taken a previous program, you’re welcome to join. Just drop us a line so that we know you’re coming. 

We also still have spots left in the Navigating Next Steps Program Series, starting this Tuesday. Creating Confidence and Clarifying Strengths runs for five weeks. It is designed to build trust and confidence, identify strengths and re-affirm values that are most important.

We look forward to seeing you.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Celebration of Unsung Heroes

Celebration of Unsung Heroes

by | Jun 3, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Gratitude, Resilience

Celebration of Unsung Heroes

Last week we held a celebration for veteran and first responders who have completed The Landing Strong Foundation and Work Force Reintegration Programs. We worked hard to make the event special, but I must confess I was holding my breath, not knowing how many people would come. Turns out, the day was a resounding success, with more than 40 veterans and first responders attending, many of whom brought family members.

A few highlights of the day included guests being greeted by grade six members of the 254 King’s-Edgehill School Highland Cadet Corps under the direction of Major Keith Hynes; being treated to heartfelt renditions of “You are not alone” and “This is me” by the King’s-Edgehill School choir, led by Stephanie Fillman; and most importantly, the presentation of our graduates, thanked by Board Chair Chrystal Fuller and MP Kody Blois.

Before coming, many of our graduates voiced a concern that they did not feel like heroes, they were simply people who did their jobs. I pointed out that we were not celebrating the work they did in the past in their official roles (although that certainly contained many heroic moments), but rather, the ongoing heroic work they are doing now in recovery. As our celebrated guests listened to the contribution of other members of their community, it was impossible for them not to realize that they were part of a very special and unique group of highly skilled professionals who had dedicated their entire lives to the safety, health and protection of country and community. All are continuing to give, continually asking themselves the question “How can I help?” It felt a bit like a superhero convention that we had the privilege of attending.

Veteran’s Affairs Minister Lawrence MacAulay, PC, MP has been a firm supporter of Landing Strong. Although he was unable to attend in person, he sent his best wishes to “our country’s brave women and men in uniform, who have sacrificed so much so that we can live in a more peaceful world.

Regarding his recent visit to Landing Strong he added:

“I would also like to thank the group of Veterans who attended that evening for sharing their stories and experiences. All Canadians owe them a debt of gratitude for their dedicated service to our nation, and my department is committed to supporting their mental well-being.”

Alan Doyle from the Dollar A Day Foundation also sent his best, congratulating our graduates for their dedicated service.

We are happy to celebrate our Spring Program Graduates, whether they were able to come that day or not and look forward to future community events and celebrations.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Training and expertise can’t help but shine through

Training and expertise can’t help but shine through

by | May 27, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Creativity, Friday Inspiration, Recovery

Training and expertise can’t help but shine through

We’ve just started a new Healthy Living program that involves participation in the community. Once a week, after our morning programming, a group of Landing Strong members attend the Windsor Maker’s studio to work with artists in specialized areas such as ceramics, glass fusion, painting and woodworking.

It’s been a blast, but there have been a few surprises along the way.

The first day, our group members blew through the glass fusion workshop. What normally is completed in 2 hours took our highly specialized team of veterans and first responders 40 minutes to complete. Not to be undone, the instructor Cheryl good-naturedly upped the ante, inviting participants to make their own designs, cutting and buffing the glass in order to create beautiful large sized fusion glass art.

We’re talking highly technical, precision work.

Instead of shrinking back, the team rose to the challenge. They quickly formed an efficient team with members working collaboratively to draw, cut and buff the 15 houses needed for their projects.

Adapt, Improvise and Overcome.

In the ceramics corner, participants applied unbelievable focus and skill in the creation and glazing of fantastic over-sized mugs.

In the painting section, our veteran artists whipped off dot mandalas with hand control precision, speed and accuracy that was humbling.

Even when relaxing, the training, skill, focus, teamwork and adaptability of our community members shone through. Most importantly, there was a lot of laughter and cheerful banter.

I am reminded of how highly skilled our population is, even following injury. I look forward to next week, and only hope I can keep up.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

Hope for the future

Hope for the future

by | May 20, 2022 | Belinda's Thoughts, Friday Inspiration, Recovery, Resilience

Hope for the future

One of the biggest challenges we can face following injury is determining how to best fit into our old lives. Picking up where we left off usually isn’t possible. Knowing how to contribute and feel as though we’re still of use can feel confusing.

As people recover, they start a process of gently exploring meaningful ways to stay connected to the things they love, without becoming re-injured. I have had discussions with many veterans, police officers, paramedics, and firefighters regarding strategies for re-involvement that do not involve further trauma exposure. What many have found is that their knowledge of safety, procedures and training runs rich and deep. Many have decades of experience.

Instead of figuring how to reinsert oneself into an old role, it might be helpful to consider the question: “How can I help train the next generation to practice safely and effectively.”

You possess specialized knowledge of equipment, procedures, and operation of million-dollar vehicles. This is incredibly valuable.

When you’re ready for community involvement, there’s a place for you. It’s just a matter figuring out the best fit. If your frontal lobe still feels off-line, no worries, with time, memory and clarity of thought will return. Procedural memories will be second nature again. You may not be wearing the same uniform, but the strengths that defined you are a constant, it’s just a matter of rediscovering them.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.Executive Director, Landing Strong

What does it mean to be Canadian this year?

What does it mean to be Canadian this year?

by | Jul 1, 2021 | Uncategorized

What does it mean to be Canadian this year?

There are many things about this country that I’m proud of.  This hardly feels like a time for celebration, though, as deep penetrating sonar unearths our nations darkest secrets.  

Today, on Canada Day, I choose to focus on the beauty and diversity of our country.  I celebrate tolerance, respect and understanding.

I celebrate compassion and education.

I celebrate the richness of the culture of our First Nations people.

I celebrate a day and time when we view one another as equals, regardless of race, gender and ability.

I envision a country where all this is possible.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

How do we make a difference when the problem feels so big?

How do we make a difference when the problem feels so big?

by | Jun 28, 2021 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Trauma

How do we make a difference when the problem feels so big?

Over the past few weeks, the very foundation of our country has rocked with the discovery of 1,323 bodies of First Nations children at various sites across Canada.  It’s believed that there are many more yet to be found. 

I’ve hesitated to write about this.  It’s incredibly important and I don’t want to get it wrong.  How do we possibly come to terms with this level of atrocity?  The genocide of a generation of our First Nations children: are we glimpsing the ugliest part of humanity? 

I’m reminded of a discussion I had many years ago following news of the tragic shooting at Montreal’s École Polytechnique where innocent lives were taken.  During a National conference of 1000 psychologists, we sat in a room together and asked ourselves the question: How to we respond to such atrocity?  How can we prevent such horrific acts of violence from reoccurring?  There were no quick answers.  We all felt powerless.  Eventually one of the speakers stood and spoke in a tentative voice:

“I don’t have the power to change the world, but I certainly can have a significant impact on my immediate circle within my community.” 

Others chimed in:

 “If each of us has a voice and speaks out, we are 1000 strong in this room alone.  If we all speak to 100 people that’s 100,000 minds that we have the power to change.  We all have an immediate circle of influence.  If we all commit to being part of the solution, demanding change, that has to have an impact”.  

I don’t pretend to have the answers.  Nothing can make this right.  We can’t go back and undo the harm that has been done.  I was taught that Canada is a mosaic woven of many different colours and fabrics.  I believe the diversity is what provides richness to our Country. 

We don’t heal from our past by looking away.  If there is to be hope for a version of Canada where all are treated with dignity and respect, we need to witness even our nations darkest periods.  

Ignoring pain does not allow for healing.  It prolongs it.  Let’s strengthen our circles, making sure the steps forward are meaningful and lasting.

This is news that needs to be felt.  Only then can we ensure it never happens again. 

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Hope is just around the corner

Hope is just around the corner

by | May 26, 2021 | Balance, Friday Inspiration, Resilience, Support

There they are.  Crocuses, snowdrops and daffodils, pushing their way to sunlight, oblivious of everything that has transpired during this past year. 

With reassuring predictability and beauty, they remind us that hope is just around the corner.

Stay the course.  

Take a moment to breathe in the fresh fragrance.

Notice the rich colours.

Like prickly bears after a long hibernation we’re eager to be roaming freely.  Reconnecting with long lost family and friends.  I vow to remain patient, tolerant and kind, grateful for the vaccinations that will once again return a semblance of normalcy to our lives.

Giving thanks to all those who have worked so tirelessly to keep us fed, healthy and safe.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder

Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder

by | May 26, 2021 | Belinda's Thoughts, Change, Courage

Working in the federal penitentiary, I frequently met inmates who chose alcohol over life.  They repeatedly shared stories of relationships that fell apart because the pull towards substances was more compelling than their desire to be in relationships.  When given the choice, they chose Johnny Walker over their partners. 

The decision to cut down on substance use (or to be abstinent) is really a decision about health and connection.  

I choose to trust.
I choose to feel.
I choose to fully live.

Abstinence does indeed help the heart grow fonder.
We run group programs year round designed to help you ensure the life you are living reflects the life you want. Feel free to call us if you’d like to jump into an upcoming group.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Noticing the tiny perfect things

Noticing the tiny perfect things

by | May 26, 2021 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Gratitude, Mindfulness

I recently watched a charming movie on Netflix called A map of tiny perfect things.  A young couple, caught in their own personal ground hog day, struggle to find meaning when every day seems a repetition of the previous one.  Somewhat like waking up each morning to hear the COVID report. They hatch an ingenious scheme to devote themselves to finding tiny perfect moments that exist within the fabric of each day.  

I love this idea.  Instead of focussing on things that can’t be controlled, I want to form my own list of tiny perfect moments.  It’s easy to miss them.   Sometimes we have to look very closely to see.  

I’ll share one from yesterday.  A young man in his late teens is at the Big Stop struggling to get his debit card working. He’s filled his gas tank, but can’t pay for it because his card won’t work.  The cashier mentions that she is supposed to call the RCMP in such a circumstance.  Immediately a woman in line steps up and says “don’t do that, how much is the bill?  I’ll get it for him”.

Embarrassed that I didn’t think of it, I offer to cover half.  Turns out the bill is only $20.

That could be the end of the story, but it isn’t.  As I am pulling out of the station I see the young man waving his arms and running after me.  He explains that he got his card working and wanted to give me back the $10 I had chipped in, insisting that I take it.  He was articulate, thoughtful and appreciative.

What a beautiful tiny perfect moment to start this week’s collection.

In group we have the opportunity to witness many tiny perfect moments.  Moments when people listen to one another without judgement.  Notes of support that are offered after a difficult share.  Celebratory cheers when there has been an accomplishment.  Or simple quite head nots of understanding when a group member shares something they are struggling with.

There are still two seats left in our Healthy Living Group starting next week.  It’s a chance to ensure the life you are living reflects the person you want to be. Give us a call today if you’d like to join.

Warm regards,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong