Looking for the good stuff

Looking for the good stuff

by | Jul 12, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Friday Inspiration, Gratitude, joy, Mindfulness

Looking for the good stuff

My house is sagging. Literally.

This last weekend while the roof was being replaced, torrents of rain found their way gleefully down through the ceilings and walls of the century-old house. We returned from the cottage on Sunday night only to realize that our home was far from habitable.

It’s been a slog sorting things out. Luckily the team from System Care is tending to the cleanup, dehumidifying, sealing, and inflating our house like a hot-air balloon.

It is at times like this that life can feel a little bit overwhelming.

I was shopping for groceries last night and purchased some Bok choy to add to an Asian stir-fry I had planned for dinner. My strategy was to overcompensate in nutrition which we lacked in physical comfort this week. Of course, I may have thrown in a couple of pieces of double chocolate fudge cake for dessert.
Here in lies the yin and yang of the universe.

Sitting at the lake house last evening, enjoying the pastel cloud reflections on the still water, I couldn’t possibly have enjoyed my cake more. For at least that moment, all seemed well in the world.

When we have those hard weeks, and things feel like an uphill battle, it’s important to build in small moments of joy. In your journey of recovery please take the time to notice the good stuff. Even if it’s something as small as enjoying a good piece of cake.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Should she stay or should she go?

Should she stay or should she go?

by | Jun 28, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Change, Courage, Growth, Recovery

Should she stay or should she go? 

She looks so innocent sitting in the corner of my office. My little porcelain sparrow. Many a day I’ve glanced idly at her while deep in thought. A simple décor item that brings me joy. In the past week, three people have told me I must get rid of her. How has she offended them I wonder? She’s just been sitting there so quietly, minding her own business. I’m informed that in a Netflix series entitled ‘Dead to Me’, my little feathered friend served as a murder weapon. Even looking at her triggers some of my clients.

A couple of questions come to mind: do I remove her, and therefore eliminate the offending associations? Or do I keep her, allowing my clients to realize that her presence is benign and that not all sparrows are created equal?

These questions form the basis of PTSD. It is an injury of isolation and avoidance. We often believe that by eliminating or reducing exposure to triggering stimuli, we can keep ourselves safe. In truth, this just keeps us injured. Only by allowing ourselves to experience triggers without the associated negative consequences can we recover.

So the bottom line is…she’s staying!

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

It’s a good thing she’s cute

It’s a good thing she’s cute

by | Jun 21, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Caregivers, Challenge, Forgiveness

It’s a good thing she’s cute

Seven weeks ago we got a new puppy; a Pomsky – part Pomeranian, part Husky. Kira is a fluffy ball of happiness, mischievousness and energy. Her favorite pastimes are stealing and hiding our socks and pulling astonishing escape-artist maneuvers. Our fitness levels are rapidly improving as we do laps chasing her around the yard.

Although Kira is much smaller than her Husky ancestors, her body remembers the joy of running as though she’s pulling a dog sled. In true Husky fashion, she likes to hold lengthy conversations with us regarding her needs and opinions and does so compellingly. Needless to say, she’s the only dog allowed to sleep in our bed. Kira’s identity runs deep. Even three generations of breeding doesn’t change who she is.

If you are injured, you may think that a part of you is lost or gone forever. In truth, who you are at your core, never really changes. You may not have the same physique you had in your 20’s, but your desire to be of service is likely still strong. The dedication, determination, and values that brought you to your work continue to serve as guiding principles in your life.

Time does change us. This can be a good thing. If we better learned to recognize our strengths, it might be easier to embrace changes in our lives rather than resisting them.

Like our furry little ball of fluff, good things can come in unexpected packaging.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Communities Of Kindness

Communities Of Kindness

by | Jun 14, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Change, Community, Friday Inspiration

Communities of kindness

It’s easy to believe the world is going to hell in a handbasket. I’d like to provide evidence to the contrary.

I went to a rugby tournament with King’s-Edgehill School recently and was speaking to Robert, our bus driver. A former 911 Dispatch Operator, Robert is now joyfully transporting kids on a 60-passenger school bus.

“I LOVE my job!” Robert exclaimed excitedly.
“Why is that?” I asked.
“The kids are amazing, thoughtful, well-behaved, and appreciative. Every day, when they get off the bus, every student, without exception, thanks me.”

I hear similar feedback from teachers:
“Every day after class, the kids say thank you as they are leaving the room.” a Junior school teacher shares.

Even coaches have good things to say about their players’ behavior: “After each game, the players come up and shake my hand and thank me,” a rugby coach exclaimed. “They even helped me to pick up garbage that some of the fans had left behind.”

These students are the leaders of tomorrow; kind, thoughtful, and appreciative.

This fills me with promise and hope…something pretty wonderful to ponder.

 

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Continuing To Make A Difference In Big Ways

Continuing To Make A Difference In Big Ways

by | Jun 7, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Friday Inspiration, Leadership, Resilience, Wisdom

Continuing to make a difference in big ways

This week I have a wonderful story to share. I recently was at the airport when I ran into a group of very fit, happy looking men, among whom was our friend and Landing Strong community member Constable Kristopher Hansen. A few weeks later, I received an email from Kris:

Seeing you at the airport a couple weeks ago, I was going on a trip with my entire [HRP] shift for a weekend. I am pretty happy to be working with a team of officers that are also friends. It’s been a very refreshing year for me, and a testament to how when things are at their worst, they do get better if you are willing to trust others…

Yesterday I was awarded another Gold MADD Canada Cst. Heidi Stevenson’s Watch Award (that makes 2 in a row) for my efforts in impaired driving in 2023. Being able to continue using the skills I learned for her to keep her name alive, has helped me feel like she is continuing to make a difference through me (and the other officers who received this award), which is one of my proudest achievements outside of my family.

I couldn’t think of someone I wanted to share this news with more than you and everyone at Landing Strong.

Joining Kris in the photo are his partner Stephanie and two of his three children. Proud moments indeed on all sides. Looking at this photo makes me grin from ear to ear! This fella has the world by the tail.

Thanks so much, Kris for sharing your news and allowing us to celebrate with you.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

We could be friends

We could be friends

by | May 31, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Challenge, Community, Compassion, Friday Inspiration, Support

We could be friends

A few weeks ago, my husband Joe was walking our dogs when they happened upon a skunk. Anyone who has seen my dogs knows that they look like they could be related to the skunk family.

The dogs stood and stared…and the skunk stared back. Tentatively, the skunk made steps towards them, as if inviting them to play.

“Zuri, Nara, come,” Joe commanded anxiously from the rear. Luckily the dogs obeyed. Dejected, the skunk turned around and wandered off, his head held low. Sucks to be a skunk.

Making new friends is not always easy. We all fear rejection. What if we say the wrong thing? What if we aren’t accepted? What if they say things that offend us?

Come meet new people in a supportive environment. We promise not to walk away…even if you arrive wearing black and white.

 

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

Before I lay me down to rest…

Before I lay me down to rest…

by | May 24, 2024 | Balance, Belinda's Thoughts, Creativity, Friday Inspiration, joy

Before I lay me down to rest

As life zooms by, it’s easy to get caught up in the high-speed lane. The list of commitments grows longer, and sleep…well, that sometimes eludes me.

In an effort to still my busy brain, I made a commitment to practice mindfulness each evening, before settling down for the night’s rest.

My mindfulness practice is simple: it consists of drawing; even if it’s only for five minutes. I’m pretty good at botanical drawings but have never mastered the art of sketching people. I found a good YouTube tutorial and am trying to etch out a quick line drawing of a face each evening.

I’d like to say it’s going well…but it isn’t. My efforts are pretty rough-looking. That’s okay, I remind myself. These things take time.

While I draw, I utter the simple word “grace” to myself. It’s a reminder to allow myself time to settle in, and over time, to grow. I believe that my sketched forms will start taking on a more human shape if I keep practicing.

Will you join the practice of extending grace to yourself?

 

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

I feel the need to grow (things)

I feel the need to grow (things)

by | May 17, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Change, Growth, Wisdom

I feel the need to grow (things) 

We are well into spring, and with it, a chance to plant seeds, prompting the earth to give birth to a wonderous assortment of flowers and vegetables. I feel a deep sense of satisfaction digging my hands into the rich soil, enjoying the warmth of the long-awaited sun on my back. I know that my intentions are taking root.

Things take time to grow. We can’t eat the fruit that we planted today. In some cases, it may take years. It starts with an intention, followed by a period of nurturing, and care. This is not unlike any desired change in our lives. With patience, commitment, and gentle care, growth is inevitable.

It’s easy to get frustrated if things don’t feel quite right at a given moment. I hope that we allow ourselves the same grace as we might to the seeds that we plant, being patient as we allow ourselves to grow.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

 

 

Do your actions reflect your values?

Do your actions reflect your values?

by | May 10, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Challenge, Communication, Community, Creativity

Do your actions reflect your values?

I recently made the effort to visit an old friend who is near and dear to my heart. I knew her from a previous life, and we both had intentions of staying in touch. But you know how it goes…weeks turn into months which somehow turn into years. The visit was wonderful, and we picked up right where we left off. I left feeling grounded, happy and inspired.

Do you have someone in your life who has somehow made their way unintentionally into your rearview mirror? If so, I encourage you to drop them a line, reminding them what they mean to you.

Our actions do reflect our intentions. This is very much the theme of our upcoming Healthy Living program which allows an opportunity for participants to examine habits, try new skills and develop new hobbies. Mornings are spent at Landing Strong. After enjoying lunch together, we go as a group to Windsor Maker’s Studio for an opportunity to develop our artistic skills (e.g., pottery, woodworking, painting, drawing, glasswork).

Is the life you are leading reflective of the values and people you hold most dear?

Come get involved with us…you may be surprised by how much fun you have.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong

 

 

Do your actions reflect your values?

Do your actions reflect your values?

by | May 10, 2024 | Belinda's Thoughts, Community, Creativity, Growth, Recovery

Do your actions reflect your values? 

I recently made the effort to visit an old friend who is near and dear to my heart. I knew her from a previous life, and we both had intentions of staying in touch. But you know how it goes…weeks turn into months which somehow turn into years. The visit was wonderful, and we picked up right where we left off. I left feeling grounded, happy and inspired.

Do you have someone in your life who has somehow made their way unintentionally into your rearview mirror? If so, I encourage you to drop them a line, reminding them what they mean to you.

Our actions do reflect our intentions. This is very much the theme of our upcoming Healthy Living program which allows an opportunity for participants to examine habits, try new skills and develop new hobbies. Mornings are spent at Landing Strong. After enjoying lunch together, we go as a group to Windsor Maker’s Studio for an opportunity to develop our artistic skills (e.g., pottery, woodworking, painting, drawing, glasswork).

Is the life you are leading reflective of the values and people you hold most dear?

Come get involved with us…you may be surprised by how much fun you have.

Warm thoughts,

Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych.
Executive Director, Landing Strong