This week, Mackenzie downloaded a podcast to my phone that I thought was terrific.Ā Ā It made me laugh, feel sad, and prompted some deep reflection about the nature of relationships.Ā Ā Itās the story of a couple trying to work out differences in three binge-worthy episodes.Ā Ā The format of their discussion is 36 critical questions.Ā Ā I use the word critical because they quickly get to the heart of what is most important in a relationship.Ā Ā At the core, do we share the same values, laugh at the same things, cry at the same time, and know how to let loose and have fun in a meaningful way?
Itās impossible to listen to this podcast without reflecting on oneās own relationships. Iāll share one of the questions with you,
āGiven the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?ā
In answering this, I went through a list of possibilities, ranging from Oprah to Gandhi to Michelle Obama. Iām happy to say that after a great deal of thought, I chose Joe. Thatās right, the same man who Iāve been married to for the past 28 years. When push comes to shove, heās the guy who I want to take me to dinner.
I invite you to enjoy the podcast, and perhaps use the list of questions (excluding #35) to spark discussion. It’s called “36 Questions” and is a 3-episode podcast musical.
Warm thoughts from the Landing Strong Team,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
My husband Joe recently shared a few āpromposalā stories with me, reminding me of the intense joy, courage and compassion felt by adolescents. For those of you unfamiliar with this time-honoured secondary school custom, promposals are the delivery of heartfelt sentiments, generally performed in a very public manner. I felt touched by the thoughtful ways people were asking someone special to be their date.
Expressing our affections for another can make us feel vulnerable, especially if we are unsure how the other person will respond. Rejection is a risk. To put oneself in a vulnerable position publicly takes even more courage.
Joe told me about a female hockey player who wished to ask out a member of the boys hockey team. His team was scheduled to practice immediately after hers. She secretly enlisted the help of both teamsā¦ even the coaches were included. It was their task to distract the intended recipient while both teams lined up their sticks to make a path to a message spelled out in pucks on the freshly cleaned ice.
My goal is to score a date with you for the prom.
Luckily for both parties involved, he accepted. I imagine a great roar of cheers arising from all those who helped orchestrate this wonderful event.
Another story involves a fellow who was in charge of thanking a particular girl during a school assembly for her role in organizing an event. He got up in front of the entire school, acknowledged her effort, and then with only the slightest of pauses, presented her with a bouquet of roses, adding,
There is one other thing I would like to sayā¦
With the entire school watching, he took the plunge:
I donāt have anyone to go to the prom with me. Will you do me the honour of being my date?
Over 400 people held their breath as they waited for her reply. After what must have seemed like an eternity to the young man, she broke into a huge smile and gleefully accepted.
These young people inspire me. How often is it that we have the opportunity to witness such grand acts of courage? I donāt know about you, but I found the adolescent years excruciating. I stand in awe of the fortitude it takes to stand on a mountain top and declare oneās love or admiration in such a bold manner.
That, my friends, is living. This week, I chose to think about how inviting others to share powerful emotions can bring us together.
Warm thoughts from the Landing Strong Team,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
This is the question I have been asking myself recently.
I know it isnāt the many photos I see on Facebook – of smiling people doing exciting things. I know enough to understand that these pictures donāt always tell the real story.
Maybe itās channeling my inner Marie Kondo and decluttering my home, keeping only those things that spark warm feelingsā¦
Perhaps itās talking to my dogs in my best birthday party voice, watching them dance gleefully on two feet just because Iām home.
Or maybe joy is something quieterā¦softer. Like a calm wave that washes over me after having a good cry in the presence of a compassionate friend or partner. Or being that person for someone else as we face their deepest fears together.
Maybe joy is more about connection. Not feeling like we are in this world alone. Perhaps we experience joy when we are seen, heard and understood. Maybe itās about being our most vulnerable selves, and still feeling accepted.
Warm thoughts from the Landing Strong Team.
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
Please join us in the first of our health promotion series as we welcome International Award Winning author Donna Morrissey on Feb 10 from 10 am – 3:30 pm.Ā Enjoy a fun day of expression and creativity as you find or refine your writers voice.Ā Watch our social media for details or email Donna directly at donnamorrissey@ns.sympatico.caĀ Workshop fee: $125
Itās a common question we ask ourselves, particularly during periods of change or transition.Ā Ā After years of service, taking off the uniform can mean a stripping of identity.Ā Ā āWho am I behind the uniform?ā you may wonder.
Growing up, I dreamed of changing the world, somehow making it a kinder, gentler place. The older I grew, the more I understood this was not so simple. Today, my aspirations are more humble. Every night as I lay my head on my pillow, instead of judging whether I changed the world, I simply ask myself the following:
āHave I had a heartfelt discussion with someone today and felt a meaningful connection? Have I been a good person today?ā If the answer is yes, then I sleep well. If not, then Iām motivated to do something about it. Itās my belief that a series of meaningful connections leads to a mountain of change, and a whole lot of purpose.
So when you look in the mirror and wonder if youāre making a difference, I challenge you to ask yourself the simple questions. Itās my sense that the meaning and purpose will follow.
Warm wishes from the entire Landing Strong Team,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
I committed to ensuring my work is filled with creativity and joy.Ā Ā Today marks a special part of that with the launch of our first veteran/first responder day treatment program.Ā Ā The program is full, and Mackenzie has been madly cooking chilli and baking wonderful treats to ensure that everyone feels welcomed and well cared for.Ā Ā Weāve run two caregiver workshops now, and areĀ thrilledby the response.Ā Ā Ā Itās such an incredible feeling knowing that a group of people who come together as strangers can so quickly form meaningful connections as they discover the strength of shared experience.
As Doug and I led the Caregiver workshops, we were struck by what an incredibly powerful and resilient group of people they were. In addition to their caregiver roles, all lead very rich and full lives in their home communities. They wear regular clothing, but in our eyes, looked very much like superheroes.
By the time you read this, the important work we set out to do today will have begun.Ā Ā I salute the courage it takes to come forward and register for a program.Ā Ā I commit to do everything in my power to ensure the experience is both positive and welcoming.Ā Ā It is such an honour to be able to walk on this journey with such a special community.
Wishing you all the best for a warm weekend.
Regards from the entire Landing Strong Team,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
It was a cold and windy day as ten brave souls made their way to the first in the series of caregiver workshops. No doubt anxious about coming to a new place a meeting new people, the group quickly formed bonds that transcended differences that existed between them.
What struck me the most was the strength and resiliency exhibited by each individual. We never know what lifeās going to throw our way, but ultimately itās our ability to get back up after weāre knocked down that defines us. I had the honour of witnessing courage, strength, unconditional support, and compassion among the members of the group. This workshop is just the first of many. Keep an eye on your inbox and our social media pages to see what exciting things are in store.
As promised, we have sent our Caregiver PDF to your inbox. Next week, we will be forwarding you additional resources to help you get through the holidays in a safe and healthy manner.
Due to the overwhelming response for Care for the Caregiver Workshop: Supporting & Thriving, we are offering it again on January 7th for those who didnāt make it in the first time around. Contact us to register today.
A special program New Year, New You designed for Military Members, Veterans and First Responders, will be offered on January 11th. Set yourself up for success in 2019. Feel free to call us for more information.
