Lately Iāve been doing a lot of reading about business. At Landing Strong, weāre committed to providing top-tier services on a non-profit budget. Hence the need for great business strategizing.
As I read, Iām struck by how many business principles are equally relevant to health and recovery. Over the next four weeks, Iād like to share with you things Iām learning with the hopes that you too will find them helpful. Please join me on my voyage of inspiration.
Lesson 1: Success is the bi-product of a series of small experiments
Itās an unfortunate reality that most new businesses fail. In the Lean Start Up, Eric Ries claims this is because new business owners tend to make a common error: they put a large investment into a single idea and hope like heck that that they got it right. The author suggests a more innovative approach to entrepreneurship is to run start-ups like a series of small experiments that inform and guide business development. No single stage is too big an investment, and it is always possible to pivot and change tactics if it looks like an idea isnāt working out as expected.
I love this notion, because thereās no pressure to get it right the first time. In fact, the assumption is that you likely wonāt get it right immediately, and youāll probably have to continuously gather feedback to inform product refinement.
What if we applied this principle to healing and recovery? One of the most common errors I witness in terms of people who are trying to make changes in their lives is the pressure they put on themselves to get it right the first time they try something new. If it doesnāt work, they assume it was a bad idea. Maybe, in fact, it was a great idea, it just needed a bit of feedback and fine tuning.
When we design new Landing Strong programs, we work hard to get client feedback at the end of each session. Why? Because our assumption is there are parts that were likely great, and other parts will probably need to be tweaked in order to improve. The program becomes the product of an organic interaction between facilitator and participants.
Recovering from trauma exposure involves reinventing the self. It is, in a way, a new business start-up. Instead of waiting to have it all figured out and hoping we get it ārightā letās consider recovery as a series of small experiments in which you will be trying on new ideas or behaviours, seeing which are helpful and which need tweaking. We should expect the first version of anything wonāt likely be right. Rather, itās a first step in the gradual shaping of something new and wonderful.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
Have I ever mentioned how much I love homemade chocolate chip cookies? Something deep within me settles as the familiar aroma of fresh baked goodness wafts through my kitchen. The simple routine of baking offers me reassurance that all will be okay.
Although routines can be comforting, never straying from them has consequences. Just because old habits make me feel good doesnāt mean theyāre always good for me. I love that there are things in life that are a sure bet, but at the same time, realize that taking risks is part of moving forward.
Iāve taken a lot of risks lately. Iāll admit it, it has not been easy. It would definitely have been simpler and easier to stay in a place that’s old and familiar.
So why do it you might ask? Why challenge myself when I could simply sit at home baking cookies and watching Netflix?
Truth is, I believe thereās something big around the corner. Something wonderful thatās worth the journey. Weāre not quite there yet, but weāre getting there. You and me and the Landing Strong Team.
How incredible that we allow ourselves to venture into that new place together.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
Itās supposed to be spring, but itās still cold outside. Weāve had a couple glimpses of sun and warmth, only to be quickly reminded that winter isnāt too far in our rear view mirror. Remember, objects in mirror are closer than they appear. This year, more so than many I remember, the wait for spring feels long. Winter brought with it a lot of ice, restricting movement and keeping us confined to our homes perhaps more than usual. With the promise of warmer days just around the corner, many of us are likely seeding our lawns, tilling soil, and preparing for growth in the new season.
This growth can take a lot of forms. It may be literally working in your yard, or might look a little different: inviting someone new out to coffee; speaking to a friend or family member from your heart; trying something new; making the decision to get help; or continuing your growth through participating in a workshop.
What kind of growth are you looking for this season? What specific steps can you take towards reaching that goal?
Remember, small steps in the right direction eventually get us somewhere big.
When I was little, my mother repeatedly tried to get me to eat Brussel sprouts.
āI canātā¦I donāt like them!ā Iād exclaim
āI didnāt give you manyā, sheād insist. āDonāt leave the table until youāve eaten them upā.
And with these simple words, the challenge was on. Belinda vs. Brussel sprouts.
Resting my chin on my hands, Iād stare down the offending cabbages. Determined not to weaken my resolve, I alternated my gaze between the congealing green lumps in front of me, and the painfully slow moving hands of the wall clock. Eventually, sheād give in, removing the plate and sending me upstairs to my room. Iād wonā¦or so I thought.
Iām reminded of the fact that sometimes if we really donāt want to do something, no-one can make us do it. Even if it may be good for us.
The funny thing is, I donāt actually mind Brussel sprouts now. Itās all a matter of how itās prepared.
Trying new things is hard, and stressful. Like making the decision to begin therapy, or sign up for a treatment group.
āBut I donāt do groups!ā you may exclaim.
Ah yesā¦remember, it all boils down to how itās done.
Weāre cooking up some great programs for you.
Starting May 24 and running five successive Fridays, Landing Strong is offering Stop faking good and start feeling good: A program for managing emotions. Iāll be co-leading with Psychologist Patricia MacDonald and Trauma Yoga Therapist Caelin Nadin. A powerhouse team who know how to have fun. Even if programs arenāt normally your thing, come out and give it a try…
Itāll be good for you š
Drop us a line at info@landingstrong.com or call to reserve your spot 902 472-2972. The program is already half full so book soon to avoid disappointment. We will work with your insurance providers to obtain authorization for you to attend.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
Have you ever wanted to just get away from it all? Burst away from the demands and expectations of daily life? I have. This weekend Iām going to Toronto to meet with family. You know what I intend to do? Pay to be locked up with them. Thatās rightā¦have an escape room experience.
I know what youāre thinking:
āYou need to get out more Belinda. Paying to be locked up with family membersā¦really!!ā
Iāll let you know how it goes. Iāve never tried one before.
Soā¦the fun may be brief, or you may not see me again…if we canāt figure how to get out.
Honestly though, I think we all just need to escape from time to time. Do something fun and with people that we care about. I challenge you all to try something different. Step out of that comfort zone. If youād like to share stories/pictures of your escape, we can post on our Landing Strong Facebook site. Just send them to Mackenzie at mseagram@landingstrong.com. Oh by the way, she is part of this as well, so if social media messaging suddenly stops, youāll know weāre really trapped. š
Keep your posts as anonymous as you wish. Perhaps your ideas might inspire others. Iāll post something of our experience.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
As I view the dark days of winter in my rear view mirrors and think about the months ahead, I find myself contemplating bathing suit season. Thatās right, the dreaded time of year when weāre held accountable for our mid-winter indulgences. I admit it, I put on a few pounds. My stomach isnāt flat the way I want it to be. Could it be encroachment of the dreaded Muffin Top?
I found myself defaulting to considering quick weight loss strategies, accompanied by uncharitable thoughts about myself and unkind words about my body. āThere is absolutely no reason,ā I think, frustrated with myself, āwhy I shouldnāt look exactly like I did in my twenties. I just need more discipline!ā I seem to be overlooking the fact that Iāve had a few kids and itās thirty years later.
Okay, Iām a psychologist, I should know better. Enduring change is built on love and compassion, not hatred. History holds countless examples.
But Iām still human. It was Mackenzie, my daughter, and our Landing Strong Director of Community Engagement and Wellbeing who reminded me of this. I made a comment about being displeased with my muffin top, to which she replied:
āRemember, the top of the muffin is the best partā.
The wisdom of these words struck deep, for I know in my heart that I am in the best years of my life. Instead of internally criticizing, Iāll focus on practicing loving compassion. A person who loves her body cares for it, exercising it regularly and nourishing it with whole foods and a rainbow of colour. A person who struggles with their body doesnāt connect with it or use it much, viewing food as the enemy. This makes enduring change very difficult.
I think our relationship with our bodies very much reflects our relationship with ourselves and with life in general. With courage, love, and compassion, weāre able to leave the dark days of winter behind.
Stuck in the dark corner of judgement and shame, we remain immobile. Change escapes us. Iāll think of you all as I wander the nature trails with my dogs, enjoying the buds of spring and bursts of colour. I wonāt focus on what I donāt want, but on what I desire, and allow that path to gently guide me forward.
Partners in recovery,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
