When we think of PTSD, we might envision a person hunched over, sitting alone in a dark room. Operational stress injuries can indeed be isolating when we bear the burden alone.
Only through connection with an understanding community, can we melt away the shame that keeps us immobilized.
If you have been following our social media, you’ll have seen many photos of people in active recovery. They’re full of smiles and are clearly in good company. That’s not by chance. They know something important. They know that working in groups speeds up recovery and allows us to go further. Significant forward momentum requires knowledge, support, and community.
By working together, we will all go further. Look for the smiles…you’ll know where to find us. Trauma recovery might not look the way you imagined.
We’re loading up programs for the new year, connect soon to save your seat.
Warmly,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Leading with Gratitude: Meet my friend Kenneth Kamyuka
During a recent trip to Toronto, I took an Uber in order to transport a load of groceries to my father’s home. My good-natured Uber driver, Kenneth, struck up a conversation as we drove. I asked him if he enjoyed being an Uber driver and responded happily:
“I love it. As a newcomer to this country, I find Canada full of opportunity for those willing to work hard.”
Kenneth went on to explain that he had immigrated from Uganda. He shared a story of his first arrival in Canada thirteen years earlier:
“You see, I was assigned a case manager to help me settle. The first time we met, she handed me a cheque for $730. I couldn’t believe it. That represented 3.2 million shillings. I asked her ‘when do I have to pay it back?’ and she said, ‘you don’t…we will give you a check like this each month until you find work’.”
Kenneth explained that he could not believe he received such a warm welcome, counting himself lucky to come to such a caring place. Hailed as one of Uganda’s top cricketeers, Kenneth later came to play on Canada’s national cricket team.
Kenneth was truly an unexpected spark of joy in the middle of a busy day. The conversation reminded me of the importance of moving slowly, taking the time to notice people, places and all things good around me. I was pleased to meet Kenneth, and proud of the manner in which Canada welcomed him. For all of those of you who have worked so hard to help maintain our freedoms, rights and privileges, my encounter with Kenneth served as a reminder of the power of gratitude in transforming lives.
Warm thoughts,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Apparently there’s a toilet paper shortage in Nova Scotia. When under stress, we run the risk of going into survival mode, taking care of ourselves while losing sight of the larger picture. If I run out and buy a month’s worth of toilet paper tonight, chances are the old man who lives down the road who has run out will get none.
That’s the difference between community thinking and individual survival.
If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together – African Proverb
Most civilians are not trained to work in high risk emergency situations. It’s times like this that we truly appreciate those who are trained in risk management and emergency response. They specialize in big picture thinking, operating from a position of prevention, resource and risk-management, and de-escalation.
A large percentage of police work, for example, involves talking to people while calming volatile situations…
Step away from the toilet paper Ma’am…
Ultimately, we all do better when we approach any situation from the perspective of the needs of the group. A panic response to stress might be a natural human instinct or response. Learning how to cope with these instincts allows us to connect with our community in a supportive and meaningful way.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Even before it officially arrived, we felt the effects of Hurricane Dorian. Bayer’s Lake shopping Centre was jammed full of cars, with people honking at each other in a manner that was distinctly un-Nova Scotian. Long lines formed at grocery stores and gas stations, and shoppers scurried about frenetically. A province where people usually hold the doors open for one another, on Friday they rushed through, allowing doors to slam shut behind them. A woman I recently met described the rising anxiety she felt at the thought of being without power. During Hurricane Juan in 2003, she went 14 days in the dark. There were many indications that this was a province that has previously suffered the devastating effects of a hurricane.
Although kids were thrilled at the cancellation of school, many of us struggled with the clean-up and aftereffects of Dorian. Communities bonded with one another, checking to see if everyone was okay. Even while I send this note out, many of you in rural areas are still waiting for power. Personally, I received a few free skylights in my roof and the removal of my porch, no charge, courtesy of Dorian. Although we are grateful that we suffered nothing close to the devastation of our friends in Bahamas, many people worked very long hours this week in order to help restore order and comfort to our lives. A special thanks to those police, firefighters, first responders, volunteer tree removers and Hydro workers who put in very long days on our behalf. I spoke with Rod, from Hydro Nova Scotia. He showed up at our house at 6:30 Sunday am to cap off loose wires and then again on Wednesday night at 10:00 pm to help restore power. His team had been working 6:00 am until 10:00 pm all week.
The effects of trauma are multi layered. Experiences from the past colour the lens through which we view our present. This recent event reminded me of that. So if you notice people being a bit less happy, comfortable, or patient than usual, let’s cut them some slack. They may have lost their crops, still be in the dark, be figuring out how to repair their cars or homes, or possibly, be struggling to regroup after being reminded of the aftereffects of Hurricane Juan.
Warm regards,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Every military member and first responder signs up knowing their job involves risk. You may not know exactly what the risks are, but have a general sense that things could get very ugly. Why do we do it? Why expose ourselves to harmful things when we know that there’s a significant chance of personal injury?
Why support a family member who may be taking these risks?
Why would someone willingly enter a burning building, respond to a fatal motor vehicle accident, take on the responsibility of making life-or-death decisions, or be in the role of caring for those who have injured others?
We do it because deep down, we believe we can make a difference.
Whether it’s through direct exposure in the field, or more indirectly through the viewing of images and videos, there’s no doubt that repeated trauma exposure takes a toll.
Through witnessing one another’s experiences, we’re able to appreciate the difference each person made. We’re a community that walks with you to understand your injury and help you reclaim parts of your life that may have been lost.
Come walk with us this Fall, we’re running group programs that are well-suited for both new and returning members of our team. We’ll be sharing details on our social media pages this week so be sure to check us out on Facebook or our website.
With gratitude,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
This week, Mackenzie downloaded a podcast to my phone that I thought was terrific. It made me laugh, feel sad, and prompted some deep reflection about the nature of relationships. It’s the story of a couple trying to work out differences in three binge-worthy episodes. The format of their discussion is 36 critical questions. I use the word critical because they quickly get to the heart of what is most important in a relationship. At the core, do we share the same values, laugh at the same things, cry at the same time, and know how to let loose and have fun in a meaningful way?
It’s impossible to listen to this podcast without reflecting on one’s own relationships. I’ll share one of the questions with you,
“Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?”
In answering this, I went through a list of possibilities, ranging from Oprah to Gandhi to Michelle Obama. I’m happy to say that after a great deal of thought, I chose Joe. That’s right, the same man who I’ve been married to for the past 28 years. When push comes to shove, he’s the guy who I want to take me to dinner.
I invite you to enjoy the podcast, and perhaps use the list of questions (excluding #35) to spark discussion. It’s called “36 Questions” and is a 3-episode podcast musical.
Warm thoughts from the Landing Strong Team,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Founder, Landing Strong
