Apparently there’s a toilet paper shortage in Nova Scotia. When under stress, we run the risk of going into survival mode, taking care of ourselves while losing sight of the larger picture. If I run out and buy a month’s worth of toilet paper tonight, chances are the old man who lives down the road who has run out will get none.
That’s the difference between community thinking and individual survival.
If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together – African Proverb
Most civilians are not trained to work in high risk emergency situations. It’s times like this that we truly appreciate those who are trained in risk management and emergency response. They specialize in big picture thinking, operating from a position of prevention, resource and risk-management, and de-escalation.
A large percentage of police work, for example, involves talking to people while calming volatile situations…
Step away from the toilet paper Ma’am…
Ultimately, we all do better when we approach any situation from the perspective of the needs of the group. A panic response to stress might be a natural human instinct or response. Learning how to cope with these instincts allows us to connect with our community in a supportive and meaningful way.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
When I was young, my parents would take me and my three siblings on road trips to visit the East Coast. We loved exploring Nova Scotia’s beaches and would spend hours looking for ‘beach treasures’ that had been left behind by the tide. It’s a long drive from Toronto, and eager to start our holiday, we tried to make the trip with as few detours as possible.
On one of these trips, we were on a remote road in Nova Scotia when my younger sister complained of feeling nauseous.
“Are we there yet?” she asked, holding her belly.
If we were smart, we would have pulled over quickly. Unfortunately, we didn’t. Minutes later, all I can say is that we all got an unpleasant lesson in wind velocity and splatter patterns.
Had we paced ourselves better, this likely could’ve been avoided. Taking needed breaks is very important, even though it makes the trip a bit longer.
I recently spoke to my good friend Finka about pacing myself at work, and I was wondering aloud about when I’d know when I’d “arrived”. At what point would I get that sense of accomplishment that the job was done, and I could take my foot off the gas for a while and not have a never ending “to do” list in my head.
“Ah, that’s the myth,” she smiled wryly, “It doesn’t matter how successful you are, in any business, each success brings more challenges. Challenge is the one thing that’s constant”
I thought long and hard about this. I’ve been operating on the principle that one day, I will arrive. My job will be done. I realize now that life simply isn’t like that. The more I do, the more I open the possibility for more to be done.
So what if recovery is like that? It’s a steady stream of building, growing and understanding. Each day we evolve into a better version of ourselves, whether we have PTSD or not. If that’s the case, the need for pacing becomes incredibly important. Maybe the point is not arriving, but the journey itself. I’ll need to be sure to stop and enjoy the view, taking a breather when needed.
What if we remind ourselves to take those precious moment to appreciate the little things. Thoughtful interactions, humorous moments, small victories. These are indeed the stuff life is made of.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
It’s not uncommon to hear people say that there’s no recovery from PTSD.
Well, in my mind, that’s simply not the case.
It’s true that you’ll never go back to being exactly the same person you were before you were injured. But when you think about it, how many of us are ever the same as we used to be? As we learn and grow in life, we can’t help but grow from our experiences. What I’m referring to is post traumatic growth.
Sure, life might have been easier if I hadn’t logged seven years working in one of Canada’s largest penitentiaries. I might not have been injured. But then I wouldn’t be the person I am today, and I’m kinda liking her.
Don’t know about you but I certainly don’t want to go back to being my high school self (although the flare jeans with Canada flag inserts were quite fetching).
I definitely do not want to relive the angst of my twenties.
I may have a few more bumps, and scars on me now, but they serve as a testament to the fact that I have truly lived. I have a massive scar across my right knee that I got while building a school in Tanzania. I’m proud of it, and in no way want to erase that experience.
If I work too hard my muscles flare up – reminders of the need to pace myself better. Areas where I have previously been injured will always be vulnerable during times of stress. They serve as my personal barometers for health. I thank these symptoms for gently reminding me when I’m not paying close enough attention to my needs or limits.
I guess I’m saying that I work hard each day to keep the superwoman cape in the closet. It’s not easy because it feels oh so comfortable. I try to simply focus on having a good day, going to bed at night feeling satisfied with whatever small thing I might have been able to accomplish.
So, it’s true, you will never be the same person you were before. It is possible, though, to become someone capable of living a rich and full life, wiser for all the things you have experienced.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Last week was a bit of a rough one for me, and my brother, bless his heart, sent me flowers.
Touched by the gesture, I brought the flowers to work so that they could be enjoyed by all. The first client who walked in the building noticed them immediately.
“Who died?” he asked.
The second person who entered the building was someone we’ve known for a while. When she saw the flowers she leaned over, closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Sighing, she sat down to wait for her appointment, a serene expression on her face.
The exact same experience, but very different reactions. Proof that emotions aren’t created by situations… rather, they are the result of how we interpret them. It’s our thoughts that determine how we feel, not the actual events. The wonderful thing about this is that it gives us a powerful degree of control over how we experience the world.
If you want to learn more, give us a call or send a message. We’re gathering names for out next Emotions group, starting in the near future. If you’ve already taken the Emotions program, the Healthy Living course may be for you. It’s a hands-on chance to apply all that we’ve learned to our daily lives.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
Let’s face it, PTSD is a label. Having a diagnosis can be very helpful as it allows clients to access appropriate resources and supports. However, it doesn’t accurately reflect the experience of recovering from trauma.
When healthy people are repeatedly exposed to traumatic and dangerous situations, it’s normal that there’s a residual effect. Like an athlete that runs too many marathons without enough recovery time, injuries are sustained that can be lingering or career-threatening.
The word “disorder” does a disservice to the injuries suffered by those who put themselves in harm’s way in the course of their work. People with PTSD are not disordered, they are injured. Their wounds originate from repeated or severe exposure to trauma. There’s nothing disordered about that, it’s a natural and predictable reaction to unnatural events or situations.
Just because it’s invisible, doesn’t mean it’s not real. We’re going to increasingly be using the term PTSI in our communications. These injuries are significant, severe, and potentially life threatening if not tended to in a thoughtful, compassionate manner. As with any injury, there’s a continuum of severity, ranging from mildly disruptive to debilitating. Not everyone who has these injuries is the same. The mechanism of injury, presentation of symptoms, and severity of harm may vary from person to person. Nonetheless, everyone has an equal right to access treatment and care in a timely manner.
Disorders are something we stick in the corner and don’t quite know what to do with. Injuries are something we heal. So we get it, without the label, it’s impossible to access appropriate care. But between you and me, we’ll be calling it an injury.
Warm wishes,
Belinda Seagram, Ph.D., R. Psych. Executive Director, Landing Strong
